Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Mountain Dew Slurpee

The chartreuse, which so becoming on fishing lures,
doesn't quite come through here.

Mountain Dew Slurpee

I used to be a true Mountain Dew fan. I'd drink a can almost every morning before going to school. I'd get a horrible stomach ache, but it was better tasting than the water where I grew up. I'd drink them at night, in the afternoon, whenever and wherever I could get one. In one night of playing Dungeons and Dragons I drank two 2-liters, after everyone left I did this vomit hiccup thing that resulted in Mountain Dew bile rushing up into my sinuses.

I sat for hours, staring into a mirror, weeping Mountain Dew tears which I would gently blot away with a tissue. It hurt a lot.

Today I got home from my two hour commute and was feeling a little wild, what with it being a Tuesday night and my not working the next day. I stop at the 7-11 and buy a plate of nachos and a medium Mountain Dew Slurpee.

I'd not had a taste of Mountain Dew Slurpee since the Bad Days of 7-11 drinks, when the Slurpees all tasted like Sweettarts. I'd had a marvelous Mountain Dew crushed ice thing at a bowling alley in Maine, in 1996, which set a pretty high bar for other icey Dew drinks. In fact, when I returned to that town six years later, I beelined for that same bowling alley only to find out that the slurpee-type machine had long since broken down and been discarded.

The guy behind the counter agreed that the Mountain Dew pseudo-Slurpees had been really good, then we wept in each others arms. It was beautiful.

So I carry my nachos home in my jacket, as its twenty degree outside. The Slurpee I carry in an ungloved hand, gingerly swapping it back and forth when the cold gets too great. At home I get my first taste and...

...it's really good. It has all the wonderful flavor of Mountain Dew, but none of the carbonation. MD does well with it's carbonation, it's an odd thing for it not to be present with the taste. There's some kind of poppy bite there, though, is it possibly to have carbonation magically locked in the icy slush of the Slurpee? Regardless, it doesn't just taste like flat Mountain Dew, and it isn't the horrid Sweettart flavor of six or seven years ago.

The bad news is that I happily pig my way through the Slurpee, feeling a caffeine rush creep up behind my eyeballs. I don't get much caffeine nowadays, so it really kicks me in the ass when I have some. I vibrate my way over to the computer only to find out that I DO work tomorrow, so I'm screwed. I'll be up till 3am, staring goggle-eyed at the ceiling and levitating off the bed at every noise the cats make.


But, 7-11 Mountain Dew Slurpee is a go.

I'm gonna give you bums the science on 7-11 nachos, but not today.

Edit: Yes, I was up all night. Asleep maaaaybe at four and was up at six to catch a train.


  1. I have always loved Mountain Dew slurpies. And for those wondering, yes, MD is the official drink of role-players.

  2. if you look at slurpee.com, it states that Mtn Dew Slurpee only contains 2mg of caffeine per 8oz serving. That very little compared to an actual can of Mtn Dew which is 36mg per 8oz so there really isn't much of a caffeine rush...it must have been a mental thing that made you think there was a caffeine rush.

  3. I can't wait to try the Placebo Slurpee next week.

  4. Sorry for commenting on an old post, but the person who said 2mg of caffeine is wrong. It is closer to 2mg/oz which is 16mg/8oz, and since that looks like a 32oz slurpee, you are looking at 64 mg; about 1.25 cans of the original.

    Since this post is the first Google response if someone searches "How much caffeine is in a Mountain Dew Slurpee" I figured I should correct the record. Couldn't find a good source for the info though, so be warned.

  5. I thrive on comments to older posts. Thank you.

  6. If you check the Slurpee website today it is 52mg per 355ml/12 oz.

    1. O Time! Who know’st a lenient hand to lay
      Softest on sorrow’s wound, and slowly thence
      (Lulling to sad repose the weary sense)
      The faint pang stealest unperceived away